Lately, seeing my kid bro being sandwiched in the iit-jee phenomenon(just after class 10 boards!), I asked myself.. How much is actually too much?? And thus came this very post.
I was amazed to see how this coaching concept has flourished in the market.”You are coached to clear the entrance test for coaching of IIT JEE entrance test!!” HUH!
And the more I go into this whole concept the more I loathe it.
I met a parent whose son had cleared the prestigious VMC entrance test some time back. He was quite proud of his son now. After listening to his saga of MISSION VMC for his kid I was feeling more symphatetic towards his kid who beared it all. To “guide” my brother he boasted that since his 9 th std he was preparing for this exam. And since you are way too late you need to work extra hard. I just kept on staring at that kid. Amazed that he was smiling all through!
Well, that was just part of the conversation we had but was enough to drive me nuts to say the least!
We all want to succeed and as parents we want our children to be the winners, always. Its natural and I don’t deny that either. But one thing that we all should keep in mind is that not everybody is a born genius. I see two kind of people. One who are born genius and the other who are hardworking. As a parent, its very important to know where your kid belongs.
Imagine this, your kid comes to you and say:” I don’t wanna study. I wanna play tennis like Roger Federer.” What would be a general reaction?
Of course, study first!
A formal education is no doubt very important to develop a sound thought process in a child. But lets not go overboard and make it the only mission in one’s life. Look deep into your child’s habits. See what brings him happiness. What is that he loves doing? The amount of dedication and running over as a parent would be less if you let your child do what he loves doing.
Another common mistake that parents do is to give your ambitions to your child in legacy. All those unrealized dreams are given to your child to fulfill. I find it unjustified to some extent. What if you are asked to lead the life of someone you are not?
I don’t wish to declare parents evils here! My concern is that in this whole process of “wanting your child to excel” parents forget to live their own lives in peace too. Its definitely not a healthy situation here then.
Its important to make your child work hard. But don’t measure his hard work in percentages and ranks. If you see your child working hard and putting his best effort, its important to pat his back on failure than to rant him.
Lastly, the one thing I feel like saying to all the parents first is RELAX! Heaven’s not gonna fall if your kid scores a percent less!
And to all the children:
“Its important to put your best effort.. Failure or success is not in your hands but putting the effort is. So better act now than regret later.”